Tuesday 09th of February 2016
I'm still having nightmares. They're getting harder to tame... they say everything gets better with time, but that doesn't seem to be the case. I wake up in sweats, barely recollecting the events in my sleep... just faces and feelings. But I have so much to achieve, I can't stop and mourn. I have to live to fight another day.
One thing I've learnt, pretending to be okay doesn't help anyone. Denial only harms you, so I try to wear my thoughts on my sleeves, I carry my feelings in my face and I say what I have to say. No more burdens for me, I no longer wish to carry the weight of my words alone. If at all you were able to feign ignorance, that will no longer be the case. There shall be no doubt!
Don't get me wrong, I'm not bitter, I'm far from vengeful... I'm human with a little bit of pissed. I'm protective of my personal space, my mental state... I don't have time to waste. It took a lot to almost destroy me, but here I stand fierce, fervent, Fenomenal, FEMALE.
From the ashes I rise, I am phoenix.
BRUTAL HONESTY 2016!! With myself and the world, I'm not hiding behind shoulda, woulda, couldas... I'm also not pretending to be more than I am. I'm promoting me, selfishly and wholeheartedly!
- Do one thing everyday that makes you happy
- Do not punish yourself for the actions of others
- Do not cower
- DO NOT LET ANYONE CONTROL YOUR HAPPINESS!
To be so lost within myself I radiate happiness to the world. To become a ball of sunshine, Nur! I want to be the definition of sabr... to find goodness in all situations and comfort in my Lord!